To whomever it may concern,
I am writing to express my interest in the position of Marketing Coordinator. As you can see from my CV, I am alarmingly underqualified for the position, have no experience in any relevant industries, and have little work experience in any jobs of any note whatsoever. I could try and contrive some ways in which working behind a bar has prepared me for this role but I’d rather not insult your intelligence.
I’d like at this point to counter my lack of experience by promising that I’m a very hard worker and a quick learner but I’m not sure that either of those are true and I don’t think lying to you would be the best way to start our employer/employee relationship. My work ethic is probably best described as passable – I wouldn’t say that I’m lazy per se but I certainly won’t be doing any more than the minimum required.
I have just completed a degree in Spanish and Philosophy. As I’m sure you’re aware, neither of these subjects have the slightest bit of relevance to the job for which I am applying, but then philosophy doesn’t really have any relevance for any jobs so you can see my problem. Nonetheless, I have spent the last four years learning things, some of which I haven’t forgotten, and the chances are, over a long period of time, one of those things will come in useful in this job.
I have no real concrete interest in Marketing but on looking through a list of potential careers, it seemed to me one of the less boring sounding areas. I look forward to hearing your response.